Friday, November 11, 2011

Box Office Review - Immortals

When discussing this film after watching it, there were some catchy ideas for starting this review thrown around. I came up with Much like the character in the movie who has his manhood smashed with a massive hammer, I to felt pain while watching Immortals. Now to be honest the film isn’t as bad as having your testicles annihilated, but I don’t any good things to say about it.

When I first saw the trailer for this film my thoughts weren’t very positive. The trailer gives the impression of a movie that is completely devoid of anything interesting. The action looked familiar, the acting looked bland, and there looked to be an over use of computer effects. This is a case when a trailer is a perfect interpretation of the film. The trailer is located below, and if you have any interest in seeing the film, please re-watch the trailer and decide if you could sit through that for an hour and a half.

Immortals is about a war between the Gods, and the Titans. Stuck in the middle are a bunch of humans, and Mickey Rourke. Henry Cavill plays Theseus, the one chosen by Zeus to save humanity. After Mickey Rourke′s gang of merry men kill Theseus′s mother, he embarks on a Star Wars like quest that includes a princess, and a monk who cut out his own tongue. His quest crosses path with people as uninteresting as himself, and then he makes his way to a Helm′s Deep like location to fight Rourke and his army. Now that probably sounds not interesting, and that would be because it isn’t. Not surprisingly, the performances are as pedestrian as the poorly written characters This goes double for Mickey Rourke. All he does is speak in his trademark barely above whisper voice and eat fruit. Rourke has done nothing since The Wrestler that is interesting, and Immortals should be added to that list.

Providing the characters with interesting sets and areas to inhabit might have helped the movie a bit, but the majority of the film looks like it was shot on a high school stage. The films setting seems like it would have better fit a mini series shot for the SyFy channel rather than a film with a big Hollywood budget. Most of the locations have straight flat walls, and that is about it.

I can't say that Immortals disappointed me, as I didn’t have high hopes for the movie. This being said, I figured it would have been a lot better than it is. Speed ramping of action scenes is a trend that needs to be taken into a cornfield and beaten to death with a baseball bat. I have no idea how to end my ramblings here, but I am done thinking about this film.

A Banana Peel

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